Emergency Call to a Shrink for Me

Markku from Finland

c 1999

Hmm, I think I'm in a terrible need of a shrink. Why?? Well, apparently I am the only one in the earth who thinks that being HOH isn't a doomsday thing or thinking, "Well, it's a bad thing to have a hearing loss, but I survive it," or something like that.

Ok ok, maybe I don't get a clue 'cause I have been HOH all my life. I'm 25 years old. I grew up using speech all the time and only know a little sign. I have, let's say, hundreds of friends in HOH world (also from deaf world) and normal hearing friends too. I think I have about 20-30% hearing left, 90 decibels hearing loss in speech area, so I should be now really down or deaf or whatever. But I'm not. I'm happy, still alive, and well. If there is a magic Aladdin's lamp, I wouldn't want the hearing back.

Cause I'm HOH I can:

  1. Sleep MUCH MUCH better and deeply than normal hearing people. In any condition, actually.
  2. I can "read" people's behaviour and be more sensitive to the message they give.
  3. I have a good humour because of all misunderstood things.
  4. Because others sometimes think I'm stupid, I get more rewards and develop my genius in secret.
  5. I understand handicap things better
  6. I know what society should do for me
  7. I get lot of support if grounded right from the government(free money)
  8. I have lot of nice cool helping devices that others don't have
  9. I'm more sensitive to the "outer world"
  10. No need to listen to what I don't want to
  11. I can help hearing disable people better; we are "similar".
  12. Wearing FM or other similar hearing device, I can hear more better than hearing people. I once sold (cheap price, of course) my notes to other students 'cause they didn't hear what the teacher said.

Hmm, ok.. I think I begin to understand what difficulties there might be cause I'm HOH, but I think not so relevant:

  1. I hate my vibrating alarm clock during hung-over mornings. Uhh!
  2. I try to always have extra batteries with me, but when I accidentally forget them, batteries, 100%, run out in middle of nowhere.
  3. Tinnitus is little disturbing, I think it is because of so strong hearing aids.
  4. I can't ice skate cause of my lousy balance (but I CAN rollerskate).
  5. Once a year have to go for hearing tests just for sure and always have the ugliest nurses dealing with me.
  6. Can't find out what loudspeakers say (but neither can hearing people).
  7. I have to put the lights on so I can hear
  8. Sometimes I get tired for educating people of my hearing; some wackos think I'm a Martian or a secret agent 'cause of my hearing aids or other equipment.
I think I'm crazy...

Emergency Call to a Shrink for Me -- Part Two

Shirley Piel

 c 1999
  1. When I missed a class in college (rare) I still had notes from class from the note taker.
  2. Going to a hearing test or hearing aid adjustment is a great free excuse to leave work early.
  3. People are impressed when I use some sign language when talking (I bought a book and learned some on my own).
  4. No annoying noises like drippy water faucet, squeaky door or a neighbor's dog barking.
  5. Professors never asked me in class to answer a question. This saved any potential embarrassment for me if I wasn't prepared to answer.
  6. Don't have to talk to annoying telemarketers on the phone.Huh?  What? I can't hear you! <click, they hang up>.
  7. I can talk to my sweetheart in secret code in public (signlanguage).
  8. Like Markku, as a result of being HOH I learned how to read people's body language pretty good.
  9. My car is well maintained because I take it regularly to a mechanic who won't abuse me. He checks it out for squeaks (brakes pads might need changing) and problems that I can't hear.
  10. Speakers at meetings talk right to me, therefore I get more out of meetings than other people.
  11. I am more "gadget oriented" than normal hearing people.
  12. I too have developed more compassion for differently abled people.
  13. People remember my name because it's associated with "that hard of hearing girl".
  14. People tell me I am a great listener (maybe it's because I have to be a good one to know what is going on)
  15. And the best of all...

  16. Laughing until my sides hurt when my dog licks my ears. That makes my HAs squeal, making him bark. Lick-Lick -BARK-BARK!Lick-Lick- BARK-BARK!

Of course, it's not *all* great...

  1. I hate the cost of hearing aids and the trouble of buying batteries.
  2. I get tired of explaining what I can and can't hear.
  3. Can't wear HAs in the shower, swimming pool, or in the rain.